Back to Colorado...part 2
I arrived in Colorado safely: wings stayed on the plane, no turbulence, etcetera etcetera. I had a couple days before Dan arrived to get all my girlie stuff done. You know, cut and color the hair, get my nails done and enjoy the massage chair while getting a pedi.
So before I knew it, it was Thursday night and time to head to the airport and pick up Dan. I was getting a rental car for this trip since I knew my mom wouldn't want to drive the 6 hour round-trip circuit to DIA and back so she dropped me off at the Hertz counter. I have a few points racked up with them and have their snazzy #1 Club Gold status where all I have to do is find my name on this board and it points me to the spot my car is in. First off, renting a car in Denver is not cheap, I found out. As much as I wanted to cruise around the mountains in an Escalade, I was NOT willing to shell out the $400 a day for it. So I went with the smokin' hot Toyota Camry. Wow, total babe magnet there. Well, I walk out to my assigned spot and a Nissan Murano is under my name! Not an Escalade but a definite upgrade of the Camry. I get in, go to start the engine and realize it's one of those cars where you push a button to start the engine...like a space ship. Or what I imagine a space ship is like. The button says "Start/Stop Engine". So I push the button; simple enough right? The radio comes on, as do all the gauges and switches but I'm not hearing an engine. I push it again...same thing. Hmmm. One more push and it turns everything off. Okay then. So I push it on again and I'm thinking, 'maybe it's like a hybrid and you don't hear the engine when it's on'. So I try to put it in reverse. No dice. This car is not on. It's just mocking me. I push the stupid button and again, just the gauges and radio turn on. I'm sitting there, hoping the employees behind the counter cannot see me looking like a grade A moron. There's no way I'm going to walk back in there and ask how to turn the car on. I mean, could it get more Paris Hilton than that! Contemplating whether I go inside and ask for help, I look down at the instrument panel and it shows a foot and the word "Brake" plus the button. I give the emergency brake a stomp and I'm still sitting in silence. I push on the real brake with my foot and push the button and voila! The car is on. Seriously, what was wrong with the regular key you put in and turned? And, you can take the "key" out of the ignition and the car will still be on. Genius engineering there.
Now I'm trying to get back to the terminal to get Dan and I've never headed back toward the terminal from the rental car area. My oh-so-helpful gate attendant tells me to take "2 rights and a left". Any indication where I should take these rights and lefts buddy? Nope. I head toward the terminal, thinking that it really can't be too hard and DIA has signs everywhere. Ha! If you've learned from my life experiences, nothing ever happens as simply as planned. The road I'm on eventually runs out of stop lights but starts curving toward the terminal. I think I should just follow it and there's what appears to be an airport vehicle headed that way too so I just follow him. Follow him where you ask? Right to the gate ON the runway. Yes, literally right on the other side of said gate is a Frontier Airlines jet rolling by for take-off. And from looking at the guy at the gate with an assault rifle, I realize that this is not a gate for civilians. I do a hasty u-turn before General I-will-shoot-without-asking heads toward the car.
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